Soft Spots

The soft spots on an infant's head do not remain a long time. So it is with my psyche. I feel a softness so seldomly these days. This morning, I listened to a Zoom production of "Yerushalyim Shel Zahav", and a softness opened up in me. The music, the beautiful voices of the female cantors, and scenes of Israel unlocked a sweet sadness. The pictures of Jerusalem triggered the old, idealistic promise of Israel, gone forever. One of the singers in the Zoom production was a former cantor at Temple Emanuel in San Francisco. She sang at my mother's funeral in July. Immediately, I recalled the perfect moment of her pure voice, singing a psalm, for my mother in the hush of a chapel.
In these awful times, I find myself angry, afraid, and aghast at the daily demise of our Democracy. Simultaneous to the present deterioration of commonly-held values, I am sincerely shocked at the extent to which people defy common sense. There is a pandemic. Nearly 100,000 people have died--parents, siblings, children, colleagues, friends, lovers. But--what--due to  ill-conceived illogical thinking and association with fear of the future, racism, zenophobia, and resentment, Americans have twisted medical advice on its head. Doctors and scientists no longer are experts. Charlatans and snake oil salesmen-like characters are the new experts. P.T. Barnum was correct.
My body is tense; my blood pressure is probably up. My mother would say, "don't let it make you sick". Easier said than done. Our country is a sad joke. I recollect Charlie Chaplin in "The Great Dictator".  I was never a chauvinist about America. However, this situation is beyond anything I could have dreamed, in a nightmare. In a seriously distorted turn, I am applying for German citizenship.
Before I go any further, I must return to softness. Pull my shoulders down, take a deep breath, and remember the unfolding of peonies, the Canada Geese that have taken over the shore of our local pond, the birdsong. Breathe again, read, and then look for the new duck couple at the fountains.

Critical Thinking

Often, we are told to utilize our critical thinking skills. Or commentators and politicians report that schools fail to teach reasoning and problem solving; educational practices do not include the teaching of "thinking skills".
I will not address the educational aspects, since I do not have the facts. However, using our "noggins" can result in challenging circumstances. The probability is high that one's thought processes, about an issue, event, or interaction, will differ from the common viewpoint. Furthermore, strategies for solving problems may contrast with those of the majority. These are common results of reasoning, strategic thinking, and analyzing any given situation or conflict in our daily lives.
Negative reactions from colleagues, friends, and family are common. People demonstrate anxiety at novel viewpoints or solutions. "Thinking outside the box" is viewed as impossible or crazy; listeners initially dismiss new ideas or methods of behavior. We are all guilty of these reactions--some more than others. So the critical thinker confronts the downside of creative strategies or novel reasoning--accusations of being judgemental; ignoring; and outright rejection. A good reason why someone might be reluctant to voice their personal opinions.
Critical thinking leads me to Profiles in Courage, which I finished in my pandemic frenzy of reading. My first caveat is that John F. Kennedy certainly should have shared the Pulitzer Prize with Ted Sorensen who did all, most, or some--depending on the book review-- of the writing of the book.  I decided to read the book because it was mentioned as illustrative of the contrast between senators who rubber stamp their party's opinion vs. those who act with courage.
JFK and Sorensen selected well-known and lesser known United States Senators from 1803--1948 to demonstrate courageous thinkers, willing to risk life, profession, political office, and status, to express their opinions. These men (women did not run for the Senate until 1932) developed their viewpoints of various bills in the Senate independent of the majority position. They processed their thoughts logically, carefully, and independently, based on their knowledge, values, and life experiences, in other words critical thinking. All of these men suffered greatly--some died prematurely. The senators were chastised by vociferous politicians, journalists, and voters. Young Senator John F. Kennedy believed these men to be deserving of recognition as courageous.

Thoughts from Rabbi Elliot Kukla

Rabbi Kukla is a rabbi in the San Francisco Bay area. He suffers from a chronic disease. His recent article in The J rang true to me. (The Jewish Bulletin of the San Francisco Bay Area)
The Coronavirus is not a blessing; there is no silver lining. The virus is a curse, like cancer and other horrific diseases that affect human beings. Anyone who proposes these ideas probably has not suffered, as uncountable humans have over the millenia. Bad, awful diseases, wars, relationships, diseases occur. Having a child with a disability of any sort is not a blessing. It is bad, bad luck. Destruction of any kind--whether it be disease, accident, or human-caused--is not to be valorized. Horrendous events facilitate creation, expression, a sense of purpose--to develop an improved world. One can appreciate the cleaner air and less traffic during the Pandemic of 2020. However, saying that this is the purpose of the virus is to ignore the human suffering. Cleaning the earth is a long-standing goal for all human creatures, not a crusade we follow when we are struck down by an illness.
Viktor Frankel, Holocaust survivor, proposed that our reaction to negative situations presents an opportunity for humans to demonstrate choice, creativity, and compassion. However, I doubt Dr. Frankel rationalized the killing and imprisonment of millions as justified--No. One is genocide; the other is learning in the face of adversity.
To return to Rabbi Kukla, relating the current situation to that of the Jews wandering in the desert after their escape from Egypt---
"In the open space that this pandemic bring to us, we have a chance to pause and begin building a new more just world."
"Like the actual desert, what makes moments of transition so unnerving, and so filled with potential, are the wide, open spaces, the huge arching skiy and expansive sandy plains of the desert."

Coronavirus 2020

Another grey day

Of solitary walkers

Hidden in their thoughts

Coming down the path.

“Watch out! That’s not 6 feet.”

My world has shrunk to a 3 mile radius.

Is this the last Spring?

Should I play the Rites of Spring?

I move through the day as if I am to survive.

I might not.

We live in a ghetto.

Pretty yes, well-off yes.

Beautiful flowers.

But the enemy lurks.

Invisible, deadly

As the Nazis.

Just not seen or heard or felt.

Lurking, no guns necessary.

Just weird round things with

Coral-like protuberances.

Orange/blue; red/blue.

Today I opened a letter from April 2, 1941, from my treasure trove of letters. I inherited hundreds of letters, that were hidden in metal boxes, in my mother’s guest closet, when she died in July. This letter is exactly 79 years old. Written in German, I translated the message, that was from my grandmother’s Uncle Julius to my grandmother.

They were in constant communication by letter. Topics ranged from family gossip to serious matters, such as attempting to save Elise, Julius’ sister and my grandmother’s mother and help her escape from Frankfurt am Main. The war was in full-swing in Europe. Chances of a 69 year old woman leaving Germany clandestinely were nil. Nevertheless, the relatives persisted. Julius was not in a safe place, enduring the incessant bombing by the Germans in London. His communication outside of England was limited due to the war. My grandmother Trude was safe in an alien land, struggling to survive in post-Depression America.

This was a generation of our elders who were well acquainted with social isolation, deprivation, and fear. Uncle Julius endured and survived The Blitz. His extended family had been scattered literally to the four corners of the globe. He feared for the life of two brothers and his sister. (The worst outcome came to pass.) My grandmother understood coping with the scarcity of items—from Depression to World War II rationing. She worried senseless about her mother (and never breathed a word of it to me).

The memory of Elise, Julius and Trude is a blessing and a reminder to be strong. I am certain they were frightened, as we are. Ours is an invisible enemy; theirs’ was the Nazis. Londoners spent the nighttime underground to avoid bombs. My great grandmother hid from probable deportation to an unknown terror. First, she was spared—as the healthy of us have been—but then the fearsome foe arrived. We hide from our nemesis, round balls with weird protuberances popping out—a virus.

As a child, I waited for World War III, part of my survivor’s guilt transmitted by my parents. If they—and all the Jews—suffered, then surely would I. I think my “World War III” has arrived in the form of a deadly virus and an ill-equipped country that should have demonstrated more foresight. So I wait now, in my house, for what is to come.

A Personal Interpretation SOCIAL ACTION AND THE CORONAVIRUS—19 (COVID-19) A.K.A.—This is not a drill.

                                                

            Coronavirus and social action, you ask? Strange notion, I know, given we are told “to wash our hands” and to “distance ourselves from others.” These seem like personal actions not social. But, by using proper hygiene, etiquette, and social distancing, we are protecting others. Every choice has social implications—always has—but now the stakes are higher and are life or death for some.

            Common Jewish ideas resonate--Tikkun Olam comes to mind—repairing the world, a concept found in the Mishnah, referring to helping those at a disadvantage. In this case, young people avoiding crowds, to stem the tide of disease, ultimately protecting older people. Tzedakah, usually thought of as giving money, can be the contribution of effort, time, and insight. Opting to be cautious in our public actions, to stay home, and lend a hand to a less fortunate person are all types of tzedakah. We demonstrate a mitzvah, an anonymous act of kindness, by following the local, state, and federal guidelines for social distancing and cleanliness during this pandemic. Every time one “catches” a cough in the elbow, one is potentially safeguarding others. Remaining at home, not going to your beach house, and changing your habits potentially saves many people from the current disease. These are mitzvahs.

I believe in the Golden Rule and the Talmudic saying—to save one life, saves many. Americans, generous indeed, continue to follow the mantra—me first. Even the seniors—who have been given a courtesy to shop in relative isolation—are hoarding. Obviously, the attitude is selfish and counterproductive. Whenever my daughter takes boxes of food off a market shelf, she notes, there are so many—six, ten—remaining for others to buy. Is the behavior learned or is it genetic? Regardless, a lesson for all to follow.

The frightening aspect of this pandemic is the unknown. The unknowable and uncertain commonly sends normal individuals into panic mode. We cannot shove the issue to a distant continent , for example, “Oh, Ebola is in Africa. Africa is very far away. And we certainly have better sanitation. We have hospitals.” As the King said (King and I)—“Etcetera, etcetera, etcetera.” The usual protective  methods for denying our risk, devices to persist in a chaotic world, are useless at the present. For example, we rest easy at night because we received a flu shot and have no underlying conditions. Oh, and we go to the doctor, and even had the pneumonia immunization. And we are not old, are we? Yes, the risk increases with 60, rising in the 70’s and 80’s. Consequently, we relax. At the least, our children and grandchildren are safe. Not so fast. Reports flashed on our phones say that half of the hospitalized for COVID-19 are “young” people. There is no vaccination, and COVID-19 is in our city! Some of us are carriers of the virus.

In conclusion, we are one community; helping ourselves is protecting our neighbors. Wash your hands, do not go to the office, walk outside, keep six feet away from others, work at home or virtually, sing, dance, practice a musical instrument or give a concert on your balcony, read, paint, write, cook, eat, drink, pray and hope we can survive. This is real. There is no escape. I am just as scared as you are.

THIS IS THE REAL DEAL!

Karen Levi

March 20, 2020

Notes from The German Trauma by Gitta Sereny

     The book is a collection of essays, written from the 1970's to the very early 21st century. The writer, Gita Sereny, was born in 1923 in Vienna. Ms. Sereny was objective and fair. She is not Jewish but refused to comply with the Nazis. Ms. Sereny left her native Austria as a teenager. She gave up a career as an actress to become an investigative journalist. During World War II, she cared for orphans in France. Immediately after the war, she investigated the kidnapping of Polish children by the Nazis.
     Reading this book was informative and intense. There were times I had to catch my breath. The work is a compilation for readers who have a solid background in Holocaust history. The subject of the essays ranges from descriptions of the post war generation to the writer's experiences during the war to interviews with infamous actors from the period. I read most of the essays, but I skipped a few which were completely outdated. One caveat--I am the daughter of Holocaust survivors.
     The "baby boomers" of Germany grew up in homes, shrouded in mystery, similar to the children of Holocaust survivors did in the 1950's--1970's all over the world. The majority of Jews will squirm at my thesis (derived from reading the book). How can the children of victims be compared to the offspring of perpetrators or bystanders of unspeakable violence? To come of age in a household with unspoken questions and responses is to be ignorant of aspects of one's history, to be insecure and anxious. Growing up with parents preoccupied with unresolved emotions regarding past trauma results in unstable parent-child relationships characterized by the transmission of misundertood grief and guilt. Children assume their complicity in problems their parents experience. Irregardless that children cannot possibly be responsible. Sensing overriding anxiety in a household disrupts the normal psychological development of an individual. Youngsters learn dysfunctional means for dealing with relationships in a home permeated with angst, especially unexplained. The children born in the mid to late 1940's to 1960 in Germany were raised by adults who had witnessed various tragedies of World War II or that their parents were Nazis or fought as soldiers.
     The offspring of Holocaust survivors were born to parents scarred in terrible ways, whether they lived in a DP camp, the United States, or Israel. It is interesting that Germans became desentized to the war trials and the plight of the victims. Life moved on, and there was no time or an environment conducive to honest reflection of their complicity. This reaction is similar to the majority of survivors unable to share the horrors of the Holocaust with others. There were jobs to be done, children to be raised, and adjustments to a new life to be made.
     America in the 1950's and 1960's was not a place to speak about the dreadful attrocities of World War II. Native born Americans wanted to enjoy the plenty of the post war period and put the Depression and war behind them. Life was fun, pretty, and clean. West Germans wanted to eat again, clean up the rubble, and be accepted in the family of nations. And guilt was too horrible to ponder, accept, and communicate with others. Holocaust survivors in the United States of the post war period aimed to assimilate, procreate, and foremost to be American. No time to think about dead relatives or why the Holocaust occurred. "Holocaust Survivor" was not a designation yet. I dare say most wanted to be normal and left alone.Yet people still whispered, "she was in a 'camp'". And these "survivors" denied the hardships they endured. For German children, growing up, thinking about what one's father, grandfather, or uncle carried out during the war, had to be a living nightmare. Bad news is unpleasant. Not knowing is worse.
     The writer interviewed several criminals from World War II. She spoke with Franz Stangl in prison. Mr. Stangl compartmentalized, rationalized, evaded, and repressed his actions. He finally admitted "guilt" to Ms. Sereny and died the next day, still incarcerated.He was an uneducated man which was a commonality among Hitler's highest advisors and generals. Albert Speer was interviewed in his sumptous houses. And he was more arrogant and resistant to introspection. Not surprisingly, he survived prison. He used the word "guilt" in association for his wrongdoing during the war, but he fell short of admitting remorse and repenting. Ms. Sereny observed the John Demjanjuk trial in Israel that began in 1986. She felt he should have been aquitted due to inconsistent evidence, the age of the witnesses, the arguments of the prosecution and defense. The author agreed that this man was a liar and probably engaged in violent acts against innocent civilians. And she stressed that claiming that a case is faulty is not condoning murder and torture.
     The women in Hitler's life were a remarkable--not in a positive way--bunch. Leni Riefenstahl, the infamous actress and filmaker, loved Hitler, as did various secretaries. Hitler was attracted to beautiful women. Riefenstahl was a success in her own right; so why she attached herself to the madman is mysterious and bizarre. Again, extreme compartmentalization occured with these women's interactions with Hitler. Their observations and comments are mind-boggling and deeply disturbing. His final secretary calmly described meals with Hitler, attending to his needs, and transcribing his last will and testament. These females did not appear insane but must have been sociopaths in disguise.

"The blocking of memory is very simply the inability of the mind to take issue and deal with an experience which is unacceptable to the mind or spirit. It is very dangerous to block the mind: dangerous for the individual, his environment, but also in the context that has not yet even been touched upon tonight--to the whole community." Leopold Lowenthal (from The German Trauma by Gita Sereny)

You May Not Like These Ideas--Difficult to digest

"These perpetrators are like serial killers, only they operate on a much larger scale, at a national or continental level. They certainly are not terrified, and they know that most people cannot and do not want to think of the possibility of an act of genocide. Ordinary people want to sleep, and the simple thought of genocide can prevent an ordinary person from sleeping. The perpetrators of genocide bank on this to set up mechanisms for mass killing in all tranquility: No one will be able to conceive, hence accept and want to believe, the truth."
Patrick Des Bois The Holocaust by Bullets

I have heard this train of thought before, and I believe it is true. If one cannot believe that a heinous act occurred, one can push the act of violence out of one's mind and forget. We do this everyday, since we cannot overload ourselves with horror. I would be beyond despondent. What does one pay attention to and what do we overlook is a question difficult for me to reconcile. Irregardless, pushing the unthinkable out of conscious thought partially explains why, for example, the United States did not act sooner to destroy concentration camps or accept more Jews into the country immediately before World War II.
The same can be said for the increase in shootings that have occurred in the last 20 years, especially in schools. The idea was inconceivable until it was ultimately understood that school shootings were a phenomenon. Israel is another example. Not before I was actually confronted with Jewish settlements and Palestinian villages in the West Bank, did I accept that Israel was engaged in an "Occupation". Previously, I had thought that Jews were incapable of racist governmental and military policies. My understanding was facilitated by compassionate tour guides who showed me the truth.
I am fortunate because I have the gift of seeing and believing. When I was 17, and I boarded a transcontinental train and saw separate train cars for "negroes" and "whites", I knew something was not right. Especially, since it was already 1968, and the "negro" car steadily became hotter, smellier and dirtier while the "white" car had air conditioning and was cleaned. From then on, I began to understand that the unthinkable was possible. However, the process has been long and slow.
The closer one is to an awful event, the more challenging to accept. Could Jews really be in favor of treating Palestinians as less than human? Could educated Germans look the other way when their colleagues and coworkers were treated worse than animals? Yes and yes. The leap from ignoring a homeless person to condoning murder is short. We think, "It's not possible. There must be an explanation. So and so was asking for it." And then out of sight, out of mind.
I saw this process in my mother, who is a Holocaust survivor, as the current president began showing his true colors a few years ago--banning Muslims, putting Central Americans in cages at the border, condoning the actions of white supremacists. She said, "Oh no, those KKK members and white supremacists aren't Nazis. Ach, no." I was not equating them with the Nazis of Germany in the last century, but there are similarities. My mother was unable to make that connection; it was just too frightening, most probably.

"I am a person who unites with others to fight evil wherever it resides, knowing that one can sometimes be influenced and become its actor or instigator...I am convinced that there is only one human race--a human race that shoots two-year-old children. For better or for worse I belong to that human race and this allows me to acknowledge that an ideology can deceive minds to the point of annihilating all ethical reflexes and all recognition of the human in the other."
Patrick Des Bois The Holocaust By Bullets

As horrifying it is to realize that we are all humans, capable of differing degrees of atrocious behavior, the idea demystifies and clarifies how people do what they do. Everyday, we need to observe our actions and those of others. I am not suggesting that we are all potential murderers, but we are capable of cruelty. Treating others badly, to saying something vile, to joining up with others, especially in certain circumstances can happen quickly as history demonstrates; threatening violence and actually commiting an act in a moment of passion go hand-in-hand, as police records or the news reports every day. Vulnerable people looking at sites on the Internet to feeling a camaradarie with others on the site to actually joining a hate group is a common road. I have no idea what happened to these typical people who murdered Jews with impunity; but, I have a hunch, it was not a long route from the Nazi youth groups to the army to shooting perceived enemies.