I am privileged to have known Sydney (Syd) Jacobs for many years. She accomplished more in a wheelchair than most able bodied people. I did not know her in her twenties and thirties when she swam to international reknown in the Para Olympics. Most probably, she demonstrated a can-do attitude before the climbing accident which claimed use of her legs.
Not to be forgotten is her husband, Mark Otto, wonderful father and professional in his own right. Without him, life would have been far different for Syd. Countless times, I saw him carry Syd up and down stairs when a place was not retrofitted for wheelchairs. Speaking of wheelchairs, Syd never to my knowledge used a motorized one. She donned car racing gloves and wheeled up and down hills and rocky pavements. Syd went where no other woman I knew went before. No chore, responsibility, or event slowed her down. I felt honored to be by her side when I accompanied her to lunch or dinner in a restaurant or to canvas for a candidate. Social activist and fierce advocate for her two children, I have watched her at work.
I met her through a parents' group called Latin America Parents Association (LAPA). She and I joined at the same time, since our older children are five months apart. We were active in the organization. She became president and started an innovative culture camp.
This was the 1990's when we Boomer couples, still idealistic, desired to be parents. Many of us had tried infertility treatments without success. What better way to help underprivileged and underserved populations than to adopt unwanted children. After arduous home studies in the United States, we traveled to Central and South America to endure hardships for our infant children, tolerating unsanitary conditions, long stays, and confinement by corrupt politicians.
Unfortunately, international adoption has ceased due to conspiracy theories and bad actors, resulting in laws which made it nearly impossible to adopt. It should be noted that those who created the new laws had no stake in the process--just a group of white men thinking they were morally upright. I am certain none of them witnessed the poverty in Latin America first hand.
International adoption, which began in the 1950's with Korean babies, had its heydey in the late 1980's through the 1990's. Now, international adoption is merely a figment of our imaginations. If it was a roaring stream, it is now a dry creek bed. Children languish everywhere. Embryo freezing and surrogacy have replaced adoption.
Syd and I chose differently regarding education for our children, nonetheless I admired her integrity and tenacity. We shared the value of honesty and seeing through the nonsense. We could talk for hours which we did when we went out together.
I will remember the play dates in parks, the shared Jewish holidays, and the LAPA events with fondness. In the 1990's and early 2000's, LAPA was my family, a community of parents and children who had a dream to be parents and improve the lives of children born to unspeakable poverty. We were liberal, cool, open-minded, down-to-earth people who valued our choices. That time, as well as Syd, is gone. We have forgotten what we parents did and why.
Son Kory
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